Seems like yesterday

I didn’t expect it, but it’s a happy feeling. Seeing hon after almost two months surprisingly seems like just yesterday. As if the days not seeing each other didn’t came. ;)

Back

Back from Kish. Yup, the most talked about Kish. As much as I want to talk about my experiences there.. Hmm.. Maybe I rather not, since there’s really nothing much that I could do over there after hearing all the stories.. I didn’t even want to get out of the room. If you heard stories of people there, expect more when you get there. But, I could say that the longer you stay in Kish Island, the longer you should keep your head. There are so many things going on there that just make me say.. Waahhh.. (Talaga.)

Though the view was really great. Went for a two and a half tour in the island. And well, seeing the side of the island, though covered with sand, has trees and flowers too. The land matched with nice white beach.. The wide stretch of blue waters, mixing navy blue and green.. Topped with the sky so clear and blue, seeing the horizon on the far side.. Is just awesome. *glittery eyes*

*sigh*


I want to spend a lot of time at the beach.. If only it is not difficult being a Filipina staying in Kish..

Change of plans

I didn’t have a plan when I came here in UAE. As always, whenever I make career decision, I just want to earn money and have a different adventure.

I remember what I thought when I graduated college, I didn’t took the board exam immediately because I’m not yet ready, I told my self that I’m tired of studying, really.. Because it doesn’t generate any income. I want to earn money first so I looked for a job. After 3 months I got my first job as a teller in a rural bank, I just had a long vacation and working there seems to be a vacation also. I mean, I don’t have much to do, the working hours are 8am-5pm and no Saturday work, during idle time I would do some crochet, read some books, text all I want, etc. that was almost fun, but the pay was low. After a week I got an interview in a manufacturing company as an accountant, I came to the interview and got the job. I left the rural bank after getting my first salary, which was 2 weeks worth of work. I used that money for my pre-recruitment expenses, as well as daily expenses when I started going to my new work.

I guess it went well, now I’m generating my own income.

After 2 and a half years of working in the manufacturing company I got tired.. The pressure started to get tiring, and being busy became boring. I found a new way to earn income, it changed my mindset financially, that there really is exponential growth which I’ve never learned to exist. I should do it, I know I should. I resigned from work with a big smile on my face. I never thought resigning could be so fun, because I know there’s more to it, outside.

Bitterly sweet I got a job opportunity in Dubai. Sweet because of the experience. So bitter because I have to leave what I’ve just found.. Leaving all the people I love.

Today, thinking back, I wonder.. Did I make the wrong decision? I’m still not sure of the answer. But it’s true however that I just made a fast decision, without much thinking and weighing and everything. And I can taste the bitterness now.. When I think of everyone, what could’ve been..

Still, I thank everyone for the support.. Of me going here. Back then.. We know something will happen and hope all for the best, now.. I still hope for the best, although most of it faded.. The sun still shines at night.

Bits

What makes me snap is when there something being done which shouldn’t and when there is something should be done and wasn’t. Priority is a key, but I came to realize that people have their own priority. Anything important to a person might not be that important to another. Like the one in the saying, someone else’s trash in another’s treasure. With this in mind, I should be calm. Calm that I don’t have to push other people to do what I think should be done, especially if doing so will result to conflict and people getting hurt because of my frankness. =]

I changed my working style now, before I always rush things even if it’s not urgent, but now don’t anymore. Simply because of the working environment, no specific deadlines so I don’t want to punish myself by setting unattainable or frustrating deadlines. But I do still want to finish my work as early as possible; I just lighten it up a bit.

Every bit of a second is important. A second spend here is a second away from my family. And that second should mean more than what it usually is.

Dreamy

I’ve been getting a lot of dreams lately. Adventurous dreams. The ones where I am board an airplane going to a place where we’ll be doing something extreme.

I don’t usually have dreams, especially when I don’t sleep too long, like 4-5 hours, but unusually I’ve been having dreams almost every night. Though I don’t remember all of it, to me its just unusual.. I don’t know why, maybe my subconscious has been running around trying to cope with my current situation that is, being away from my family. For 22 years I’ve been living with my family, never been in a boarding house during college days and even got rejected taking review for board exam knowing that I would be living in a boarding house in Manila.

Yep, I miss everyone. And no, I’m not homesick, because I couldn’t and can’t afford it. So what to do now.. Ahh.. Just let my subconscious dream, fill the gap for what I’ve been feeling.

Surprised

I love hearing true to life love stories. I like listening to my friends talking about their own love stories. Kakakilig ika nga.

Experiencing my own love story is unexpected and quite surprising. It’s unexplainable. For this moment, I just want to say, Thank You. ~~,

“Sige lang”

This is a nice quote. It’s something I get to say to myself nowadays.

People usually say I make tasks look easy. I just do, but it doesn’t mean that it’s really easy.. I just don’t want to push myself to hard. And I need to relax when doing a difficult task for me to finish it. Being rushed doesn’t work for me and so does panicking.

In my school days I never reviewed too much during exams, I don’t like disappointments. The thought of me exerting too much effort and failing is not a very good sight to me, so better avoid it. But of course for a student to push himself hard in studying has its benefits, its just that, to me that is something I didn’t even thought of. But it could be nice right?

My parents never pushed me that hard and never told me any expectations of theirs, thankfully. I remembered telling my mother I got grade of 1.00 in algebra and she didn’t react that much. High grades seems to be a small thing and I now understand why.. Because after all the studying the real exam is here in the real uncontrolled world.

It’s almost 5 months now, since I left the Philippines, leaving so far away from home. Ah, this is what they call independence.. Right? Pushing myself harder, working hard and functioning. It’s sort of weird. But it’s something I need to do. So, sige lang.

Numb

My hands and arms ache. I feel tired. I finished washing my clothes and bed sheets by 3:00am this morning. I started as soon as I arrived from work and that is past 11:00pm.. *sob* Right after that task I can’t sleep yet so I watched a couple of Criminal Minds Season 5 Episodes, opened my facebook account and by 4:00am went to sleep. I slept so well that I forgot the time, got up late, whew, the shuttle service almost left me. =D

But being tired, not much sleep and having parts of my body ache wouldn’t be so bad than having my heart go numb, well not literally.. It’s still beating. But, for a split second it feels like I couldn’t feel anything.. Like I’ve been boxed, separated from everyone I love and care for. Ah. Glad that’s was just quick.. Because it would be sad if that instance lingered.

Numbers

I’m an accountant by profession. People always say that I like numbers because of my profession. Hmm? Do I? Well, come to think of it, what I really like is Algebra, simply because even how hard a problem is just use the correct formula and I’ll get the exact answer. But how about in life? Yes, this is applicable also. In any problem just use the correct formula and everything will be ok. And the correct formula is trusting God. He knows best, just come to Him and entrust everything to Him. =)

Turning Black

*sigh*

Hate it when it turns into black.

This is what happens when I’m busy at work. So busy that I tend to be so focused in it and forget the other things outside work.

Hmm.. I guess it’s the pressure.

That’s when it really turns to black..

When I’m pressured, I want to get over it as soon as possible and anyone standing the middle of me and what I need to do.. Sometimes.. Err.. Maybe most of the time.. Get the shots. ^^,) Ұ And I wouldn’t realize they got hurt until they back off from me. And it sucks.. For me.. Because I did it. And it doesn’t feel good.

*sigh*

But as of now, that’s how it is.. To me.. I really just need to learn to identify that situation and turn away from it. Ah, I don’t want to hurt others.. Who wouldn’t?

Post No. 1

Hmm..? I guess.. Things change. The world. People. Everything in earth. Me.

 

Yup, I did change, in many ways.

 

Life is a path of changes, walk slow or even run; you would still reach the end of the road.

 

I remember last year changes started in my life.. Bit by bit.. First, me sulking in my dark little world is now gone.. Then I met a lot of new people who contributed in the change of my mindset. Then I resigned from my second work, where I’ve been for the last 3 years and 2 months. Then I went wondering around.. Unexpectedly I got same job in Dubai, U.A.E. Ahh.. I remember, that was a super decision. But I just said, I know I should go, I have to. So I did. For that couple of months it didn’t felt like I’m out of the Philippines except of the environment, dusty yet clean. Maybe, because all my co-workers and roommates were Filipinos.. Then.. I left Dubai and moved to Abu Dhabi after getting the same job.. (Thinking about this seems tiring. Hehe.. Anyways..) And I’ve changed some more.. More new people to meet.. Additional effort in communicating to fellow expats. Experiencing life in a different way.. In an alone but not so alone way. (Whatever that is.. =D)

 

And all of this.. Is part of getting near to the aspirations which are always in me. Now, I see myself changing some more.. for the better. Always.

Chocolate Bar Hobby.. Rewrite =)

My chocolate bar hobby is a codename for things that I like. I have a chocolate bar hobby before but it’s more on an obsession.. So, now, here’s to the re-write of my chocolate bar hobby. Kampai! ^^,)~